MARTAY Pantsss

Last Tuesday I got offered a job at the only four diamond hotel in downtown Atlanta. I was ecstatic, until...

No parking? Heh? Come again?

Ok, ok so it would suck to pay for monthly parking, but honestly I was more concerned about getting off work at midnight in downtown Atlanta and having to walk half a mile to an empty parking garage. Let's just be for real, I haven't unpacked yet and I have no idea where my rape whistle and mace are.

I may have had a minor panic attack and maybe I cried like a little girl. Who can really say? All I can say for sure is I was freaked the fuck out. Questions like: should I not have moved here? what am I doing? definitely crossed my mind for like a second and then I realized I was just being silly. Atlanta kicks ass.

So, I started thinking. How can I get to and from work without being robbed or raped? Obviously very valid questions. My stepmom mentioned using MARTA, Atlanta's public rail system. My step brother flashed his breeze card at me and dared me to take MARTA to work on Thursday. Heh... Heh. I kinda wanted to, but at the same time the thought of it made me want to pee my pants and throw up at the same time.

It's not what you're thinking. Ok, I don't know what you're thinking. But this is what I was thinking, because I am an anal, anal person. Well... at least about punctuality. How could I risk taking MARTA on my first day of work? Without a trial run? Without a barf bag? What if I got on the wrong train? What if I got off at the wrong stop? AHHHHHHHHH!!!!

But somehow when I left for work the next morning, I drove to the North Springs MARTA station (got off at the correct exit, despite the lies my GPS was telling me) and made my train... And then my connecting train. I'm happy to report I didn't pee my pants or throw up in my mouth, not even a little.

I decided a might even use MARTA for pleasure. Although I hafta say... I'd like MARTA way more if I could drink on the train. "Totes my goats".

Xoxo, Jildo and self proclaimed MARTAY Pantsss

P.S. I almost forgot. Riding MARTA is also tres responsible, as it is safer and cheaper than public parking (there is a station inside where I work) and I will save gas money since I won't be driving. Oh, and I won't be stuck in that hellish Atlanta rush hour traffic. Hallelujah!!!